10 Pint Movies: PSYCHO KIDS

The Children (2008)

Plot: Christmas time mistletoe and wine, when families get together and their kids cut them up with knives, well they do in this film. Two annoying middle class families you know the kind who probably bore the people they work with endless stories of how wonderful their kids are no matter how much disinterest you show and how many times you say "I couldn't give two shits and a fuck what your kids do". Probably spend there days home-schooling while eating placenta and smelling their kids farts.

The get together starts of well but you can sense even the sisters Elaine (Eva Birthistle) & Chloe (Rachel Shelley) do not really get on and always want to one up each other just like pushy dad Jonah (Stephen Campbell Moore) & pot smoking Robbie (Jeremy Sheffield) . Elaines eldest daughter Casey (Hannah Tointon) wants to be out, probably sniffing glue and getting fingered, she tries her best to leave but the house it isolated and a signal is difficult to get.

Its Alright didn't like the little bastards anyway

The next day the kids who have been suffering from some sort of virus start to act a bit strange and to get violent, the violence escalates but will the parents and can they bring themselves to defend themselves against the kids they love so much.

Is it good: Yes, With help from great acting Tom Shankland has created an great British horror fick, an update on the killer kids story (that isn't a school massacre) taking aspects of The Brood (1979) Children of the Corn (1984) Village of the Damned (1960/95). The tension builds effectively. The acting is good most of all the kids who seem to relish there roles and play creepy just a little to well (there real parents should watch out).

Creepy little fuckers

Hannah Tointon is emo sexy as Casey, shes the sister of the uber dirty looking kara tointon (Dawn Swann Easterners and that dancing crap) and don't worry she was in her twenty's when this was filmed so don't feel bad if you want to knock one out.

There is some (pretty good) gore, the doll stomach thing was just nasty, but this is more of a tense thrilling kind of horror. creepy, atmospheric and suspenseful.

Why not

Turdige:Some people complained the plot is quite simple but I don't see a problem with that. Also they are just kids you could take on about 50 of them, a bit more difficult if the the woman has shit them out of her vadge she might be attached to them.

Overall: A great British horror film, with creepy kids that would give the Japanese a run for their money. The film is basically a warning to parents who feed their kids humus and don't let them watch Power rangers (or whatever is popular these days????).